What Motivates You?

Motivation is concerned with why people behave the way they do. In the workplace motivation is normally focused on performance and controlling or directing people to work more effectively. Why people do what they do is a question that dates back centuries and has challenged managers everywhere to find ways to help people engage in their work to produce better results. There are a number of key thinkers that have produced theories of motivation: Maslow created the hierarchy of need, Macgregor gave us X Y theory and more recently there have been a whole range on personality 'tests' like Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) developed to help in the understanding of what makes people do what they do.
All of these theories and tools have a place in detemining what makes people tick and how this key determinant will affect how they act and interact with others, perform a particular role or conduct a task. Making use of such tools is one way in which managers can seek the best ways to motivate their teams - knowing what makes each person energised to pursue a goal or objective should make it easier to find incentives to move that individual forward and keep moving them towards new goals.
The difficultly many people encounter is that the systems used by organisations to set goals and objectives does not allow for highly individualised goals or objectives. When goals become too broad or too narrow they either become too general to have meaning or are so focused that only a few people will engage with them. To motivate people we need to find solutions that are flexible while supporting the broader organisational goals. A combination of very personalised goals with broader over-arching objectives for the team will help. So too will each manager's ability to listen to each individual in his/her team and help create challenges that the person really will want to achieve. It takes time to Understand and to Value each person's motivations but to do so will bring about excellent team communication, more collegiate working and a better appreciation that we are all different in our needs and wants.

The Critical Friend

Throughout our lives we build and rebuild our own map of reality. This map is made up of stories, experiences and incidents that have made us who we are. Our map is a place of familiarity and in many ways it keeps us safe from the rest of the world. The problem with our maps is that they tend not to have a control or regulatory button to check whether what the map says is true or not. We may develop our map in isolation and if we are not open to some kind of 'reality check' our map could potentially lead us down the wrong route. This process of reality checking is where it can be useful to have Critical Friend; someone your trust and someone who is experienced in giving feedback that is both positive but challenging. A Critical Friend may be your partner, a work colleague, a coach, or even your boss! Whoever you choose to use as your Critical Friend there are a few things you need to consider.
First make sure the person your want to use in this capacity is emotionally strong (or emotionally intelligent) - you do not want someone who cannot address complex and challenging issues without falling apart!
Next, consider why you want this particular person to act as your Critical Friend, what is it you admire about them, what will they bring to you that someone else cannot?
Think about what you want from this relationship and how it will work. Consider your Critical Friend and what their needs might be.
Finally think about how long this relationship will last. A true Critical Friend could be someone that you keep in touch with for many years so choose carefully.
Next blog will be on motivation!

Make me Assertive

Assertive? Aggressive? Quitely confident? Down right abrupt? All of these are comments we are familiar with and likely to hear in our workplace. But what is assertive and how do you become assertive? One defination quoted in Tosey and Gregory's Dictionary of Personal Development (2002) suggests assertiveness is 'a person's ability to act in his or her best interests, understanding what he or she needs or wants, and appropriately seeking the necessary gratification with out undue anxiety.' That's all very well but what does it mean in real life situations where we can often find expressing ourselves difficult.
It is clear that the ability to express our needs in a clear and articulate manner is linked to how we feel about ourselves at that moment and is also directly linked to our self esteem. So assertiveness is person and situation specific. In effect being assertive is about being able to say what you are thinking or feeling with due respect and regard for those around you. Making your point at the expense of others is moving towards aggressive behaviour.
Learning how to be assertive requires many things:
listening skills
the ability to understand and control your own emotions
an ability to articulate what you want to say making use of language that is not threatening
being very aware and taking regard of other people's feelings.
Phew! A lot to do if you are to genuinely be assertive. Thankfully I've a few tips to help.
First - no matter what the situation, clarify before you respond. Take a minute to ask what is expected of you (even if you know what you want to say) that way to 'buy' a little bit of time to form the words you will speak.
Second - speak slowly so that you can also listen to yourself and watch the reactions of others - this will allow you to moderate what you are saying if necessary.
Third - have a stock of key phrases you can use to help you become assertive!
This last part is essential as it will help you not be assertive without worrying too much. This idea is based on the old adage 'practice makes perfect'. If you are able to call on a few positive phrases to help state what you want then you are half way there. Here's an example "I understand that you are not the manager and are not able to make this decision, however, I do expect that you can make a note of my complaint. So if you would be so kind..."
The key words here are 'understand' - which creates empathy with the other person, 'however' - which suggests that you are not satisfied and more is to follow, and 'so' which is where you state what you want to happen next! In the example above it could be to call the manager, pass on your compaint or get him/her on the phone.
So being assertive takes practice, patience and careful consideration.
Next time I'll be blogging about the Critical Friend!

Unblocking the inflexible individual

We have all come across someone who is fixed in their views and is more likely to answer no than yes when asked if something can be done. This type of person can be infuriating to work with and can cause tensions in teams. So what do you do? Ignore them or pander to their behaviour? What you do is important because it will set a pattern for a long time that can be hard to break. People who are inflexible can tend to dismiss new ideas, focus on details (to thwart the discussion of bigger and more important topics)may hold grudges and can have fixed ideas or closed minds. The key to working alongside this type of person is to get them on side and to unblock their negative perceptions.
Sounds great but how do you achieve this? Well, first you need to invest time in listening to them - get them to open up about a particular situation, take notes and paraphrase them if needed to ensure you have a clear picture of what they are thinking. Ask them questions and give them time to show off - this will allow you to see where they are correct in their thinking and where the thinking has become corrupted by prejudice or misunderstanding. Do not challenge them directly at this point. Next you need to rebuild the picture of the situation this time ensuring that they see you as an expert - try to avoid negative words such as but. The idea is to form an alliance to resolve the situation.
You need to get the inflexible person to come up with solutions and possible ways out of the situation, ask lots of 'what if' questions as they do to point out the advantages and disadvantages of each solution. If you have a preferred option it may be possible to introduce this as a hypothetical solution upon which you seek their views!
You need to get commitment to action for the situation to change so ask for details (this is something the inflexible person should like) about how an option would work in practice, how would they contribute to this option and when would this option be put in place.
The inflexible person can be afraid of change, fear failure or prefer to know exactly what is to happen and when. This knowledge is central to you helping to move them on. In summary, you need to listen to their side of the 'story', build up your relationship so that you can work together, get the inflexible person to identify options for the way forward, get them to make commitment to actions and don't forget to follow through and evaluate the results.
Next time I'll be blogging about being assertive.

Beat the Bully

Any information given here is meant to help and is not intended as a substitute for professional support or advice.

It could be at school, at work, and sadly sometimes in our own homes where we might encounter bad behaviour. How to manage this can be difficult and challenging. There are common traits that emerge when you look more closely at bad behaviour and these traits can help us to deal with it when confronted by unacceptable behaviour. People who are bullies may themselves be experiencing some sort of bullying behaviour in another part of their life - this could be current or in their past. Regardless this is not an excuse for how they are behaving and it should not prevent you from taking action to protect yourself against the bully. Bullying behaviour can present itself in a number of ways - insensitive to the needs of others, competitive attitude that must win no matter what, controlling or domineering actions are all bullying behaviours. What we need to do is recognise these traits and stand up to them - challenge the behaviour. The aim is to make sure that in the future your interactions with the bully move from control to collaboration through helping the bully to learn new ways of gaining reward. First you need to get their attention and their respect by making it clear you know what they are doing and that it is unacceptable to you. You need to verbalise this while making direct eye contact (don't stare, just look them in the eye!).Use the bully's name and keep using it while you make it clear that the bullying is going to stop. Say what you need to say as many times as you need - don't let them shout you down. Keep summarising what you expect to happen in the future - "Michael, in future when we work together we will discuss our plans and we will not raise our voices or throw things around the room. We will agree actions that both of us can and will undertake." (Using the bully's full name can add impact).
You need to engage the bully in your challenge, they need to be asked what they expect and what you expect in the future. Keep your voice clear and strong. Assume you will be successful in the conversation and stay calm throughout the challenge. Rememnber to summarise what has been said, what has been agreed and if you need to put this 'agreement' in writing.
Stay positive and keep on track during this challenge. It is easy to get sidetracked so perhaps you might want to make notes so you can refer to what you need to say and what you want to happen in the future.
Key things to remember - speak clearly, use the bully's name - often, be specific about what needs change, don't let the bully interrupt you shout you down. Take a deep breath before you start your conversation and keep breathing slowly to stay calm.
Next time I'll be blogging about people who are very inflexible in their attitudes and how to unblock them!

Ethical Downsizing

When it comes to making people redundant it is always difficult to make this a positive experience, and the feelings of guilt (for those who remain in jobs) and anxiety of those losing jobs is very real. A good employer will make concrete plans to make sure anyone leaving the business does so in as positive a manner as possible. Afterall, ex-employees have a voice and can help retain your company's good reputation or ruin it dependant upon how they feel they have been treated.
So how can you approach downsizing in a positve manner? Well if after all efforts have been made to retain staff and the only way forward is job loses you need to think about how to exit people with enough support to help them move on. So, how about their CV, assuming they have one, is it up to date, fresh and attractive to potential employers? What about Interview Skills - how long has it been since these people were interviewed in a competitive environment? And what about the job market -where do people begin to look for work. Options other than work also need to be explored, what about self employment, partnership ventures with colleagues in the same situation, part time or voluntary work? These and many other options are valid and need to be explored so that people have a clear plan of action, with the skills and tools they needs to best determine how to spend their time while retaining their self esteem and confidence.
There are many other consideration for people changing the way they work and good practical advice on financial plans, working patterns and changes in their personal circumstances will all play a part. As a good, ethical employer, your task is to provide the supports that will help people reframe their thinking and see redundancy as an opportunity and not as the last exit to nothingness. You have invested cold hard cash training people, developing their skills and in return your business has benefited. Now that you have to downsize keep this investment philosophy going and help each individual to redesign their future by downsizing ethically.
Next time I'll be blogging about bad behaviour (with a focus on the bully) and how to manage it!

The lonely leader

Leadership is a much used term and there are many courses, books and seminars available to people who wish or need to develop skills in this area. The problem with many of these activities is that too often the focus is on management and leadership theory, with too little emphasis on the practical problems that leaders face. I an often engaged by senior people to work through issues related to critical decisions that will impact of large numbers of people. As an MBA graduate the creation of strategies and assessing the risk of adopting new strategies is reasonably straightforward. This is also true of people at the top of their game. What is more difficult to capture and why leadership is often a very lonely place is the leader's ability to find a support mechanism to talk through strategic change and risk, that is truly safe. A safe place is a confidential place, it is non judgemental, its motivations are transparent and it is a place where a leader can find perspective without fear.
Picture this, you as a senior executive, need to make a decision that will result in job losses. You and you alone are responsible for the decsion. It's tough and you need to move forward. How are you to live with the knowledge that by agreeing to a particular approach many people will lose their jobs? The stress of this decision is difficult to manage and to show stress at work could be seen as a weakness. Thankfully there are things you as a leader can do to help. First take a step back and understand that this decision has been created by a set of circumstances, not all of which are or were within your control. So, take a deep breath and feel some of the stress flow out of your body. Next, you need to focus on the good that will come out of the decision - jobs saved is one such good thing. Keep focusing on the positive and keep breathing deeply.
Now that a little perspective is beginning to take shape you need to look at where you sit in the decision making tree. How did the need to reduce staff numbers come about? Who was involved in this discussion? What data has been used to calculate the reduction? What are the benefits to those left behind? Asking these questions will help gain insight and give perspective, helping you to realise that no matter how tough a decision is, it is rare that it is based on isolated events. That means you should not isolate yourself or take on too much of the stress related to this or other decisions. What you need is to create a safe place to talk through issues and decisions. Talking out a problem with someone who can listen and help find focus and clarity will help bring you back to perspective, work ethically and be more human in your approach to decsion making. A metor or coach is the ideal 'safe' place to start this journey and reduce the potential isolation that leadership can bring.
Next time I'll be blogging about how to downsize in an ethical manner!